Tuesday, December 29, 2009
The circumstances for which any of these past events in their life happened may not have been of Gods design, but I know God can turn all things around. I know He can use these past events and ones to come into eternal life changes. I know that God can & will use them for his Kingdom purpose.
'My Father...MY God and Savior, I ask you to bless this new marriage and this new family with your Love, Grace, Mercy, Wisdom, and peace. I pray they would follow you and your will all the days of their lives. I pray they rest in you and your provisions. I pray their days would be filled with love! God bless Raul, God bless Kari, God Bless William! In Jesus Name...Amen'
Thursday, December 24, 2009
Here he is....prebath...better pictures later.....
Tuesday, December 22, 2009
Wednesday, December 9, 2009
Monday, December 7, 2009
Daily I 'work' at keeping my focus Godly. The waves just keep crashing in...pounding. Then there comes the rogue waves. They can be killers but fortunately I have my life vest on. Jesus keeps me afloat. Doesn't mean I don't get big ol' doses of salt water in my face but He keeps me from sinking.
What has been hard this week, and it's not the first time, is the weariness of treading . Oh how I want to be free....free falling! Just floating through the air knowing that I have 100% confidence in the one who gave His life for me. The one who suffered unbelievable torture and pain. The trials I suffer are NOTHING compared to what others suffer....NOTHING! My kids are not starving, my kids are not ill and dying. My kids drink clean, clear water. We are not living on the street or in a homeless shelter. We are not being woken at night with bombs exploding. We are free to worship our God openly....and yet I allow the trials I suffer to rock me to the core. I have faith, I speak faith, and yet in my inner most being I can not always REST in this faith.
BUT each day I hold onto the one who created me...that each day, each year the faith I have fills me fuller and reaches deeper and deeper inside of me. Someday I know I will attain that level of faith I desire....that day will be the day I then breath my last breath and then come into the presence of my savior. The 'race' will be finished.
Just this morning this is the Scripture the Lord brought me to:
James 1: "Consider it pure joy, my brother, whenever you face trials of many kinds, because you know that the testing of your faith develops perseverance. Perseverance must finish its work so that you may be mature and complete, not lacking anything."
The testing of faith is what develops perseverance. I want to be mature...in Jesus. I want to lack nothing. Full peace. Full freedom.
So as I wrap this up...what appeared to me as my shortcomings are actually my immaturity in my faith. That each time I find my self splashing around in a trial and feeling like I should be stronger..., it is then I am persevering through and gaining strength...I am gaining maturity. What I see is I am not expected to be perfect out of the gate, I am to take each trial and allow it to build me up "consider it pure joy." The joy is not the trial but the next rung we take in getting through that trial by our faith. Faith in the Father, Faith in the Savior, Faith in the Holy Spirit. The faith that we are saved by GRACE!
Ephesians 2:8 "For it is by Grace you have been saved, through faith and not from yourselves it is the GIFT of God, not by works so that no one can boast."
A gift...it is through the Grace of God we have been saved eternally. The faith we have in that...in HIM is what gets us through. Persevere through the trial with Joy because we know God has saved us...what more do we need aside from eternal life? Nothing!
NOW...... Now I need to meditate on this truth day and night....before during and after the 'trial.' Meditating on it until it reaches my core and replaces my insecurities. Reaches my fears.........until it fills me up and overflows!
"I've got the Joy Joy Joy down in my heart.......to stay"
Saturday, December 5, 2009
I LOVE Christmas! I am not a huge decoration fan....maybe I am just too lazy to set it all out just turn around and put it all away again. I love to look at them though. I had a fake tree for a few years...LOVED IT...then I remarried and he insisted on a real tree. We have had some great times going out to the tree farms and picking out a tree (we never go to the same farm) and cutting it down. The kids have loved it but to be honest....I miss the fake tree. No mess...you can put them out as soon as you want and leave up as long as you want. No fire hazard and once the initial cost is over...it's free. My husband came to me and said this would be the last year of the real tree...so now I will be on a mission to find a nice fake tree. The kids were bummed but they will see how fun it can be.
I love Christmas for the music, the movies, the lights, the love. The Christmas story is the most beautiful story. I have loved it since I was a kid and still do. It amazes me the faith Mary had to accept Gods will for her. How scary to think you will give birth to a child though you are a virgin and especially in those times when women would be stoned for looking at a man who was not their father or husband....twice. But she willingly accepted Gods plan for her. God chose her out of the entire universe to carry his son. Wow...and as the prophet said, a knife would Peirce her own heart as well....
So, Christmas is coming and the Christmas music is already playing in our home...just about every room actually. The kids have their radios tuned into the local Christian station who started playing Christmas music the day after Thanksgiving. It's great, we love it.
This month has started off hard...but I will not give up my faith in Him and His plan for our life. For a young virgin girl who was visited by an angel said "I am the Lord's servant," Mary answered "may it be to me as you have said." indeed, may it be as you have said Lord.
Thursday, December 3, 2009
Sunday, November 29, 2009
SOOOOOO...this post is more of a request...do you or someone trustworthy you know, know how to knit these and could make me some? Of course i am willing to pay for them if I have great references about them. I thought it was worth a shot......My adult kids love them and really want some for 'their' new families.
So, shoot me a reply if you can help out with this 'Family Tradition.' Here is an example of the stockings. In this pic they are full of goodies and laying on a couch...not the greatest quality pic but gives you an idea.
Wednesday, November 25, 2009
My grandparents, though they have all gone 'home'
The State of Oregon
Clean yummy water
Our wood stove
All the free wood my husband has gathered
My nieces and nephews and the greats too
My grandson and the grandson on the way
Washer and dryer
so see the list could go on and on....life is amazing!
There are a few things I WOULD be thankful for....
Self control with eating and exercise
Spouse who would get on track and stay there
Vacation to Hawaii
AND this one...especially in honor of Thanksgiving!
I can not express enough how sad it is that this country has allowed a beautiful holiday to be tainted with something so trivial as football. How a lovely family day is torn by the obsession with football. That is NOT family time. Never has been and never will be. But it isn't going away....except in my house. Football is not allowed on Thanksgiving...many in my family are THANKFUL that Thanksgiving is NOT held at my house. hahaha
So...that's my rant on that!
So much to be thankful for...so much! which that in itself makes me so THANKFUL!
Friday, November 20, 2009
In 1992 I went to the Greenhill Humane Society in Eugene Oregon looking for a new buddy. I took my oldest daughter, who happened to be my youngest at that time, and we walked along the kennels looking at the beautiful faces of lost dogs....waiting for their new families to arrive. I heard a yipping coming from a kennel not too far down the row. There sat, as pretty as you please, a little black, year old dog. I checked her out and moved on....the yipping started again. We went back and there she sat all proper. Every time we walked away she would start jumping and yipping. Well....she stole my heart. It took us a week (due to paperwork and stuff) to actually adopt her and bring her home. We kept the name she came with because she was such a doll. She was a chihuahua mix...though she didn't look like a chi. She became my shadow. She was where I would be. We made a few moves over the years, living on a farm (she LOVED to chase the bunny's and look for mice) then back to the city, where she loved to ride in the car and to be held. She was spoiled her last few years of life by me and my parents. She loved going to visit at Grandma and Poppy's house. She was worse than the kids at getting excited to go there. She even had her own bed with big blankets there...they kept treats for her and she ruled their roost. I would let her out of the van, she would head down the sidewalk as fast as she could go...leash free...and right to their door. Also, she would wait for those moments when Poppy would go to put his socks on...she would burst with excitement and start biting at his feet because she knew that meant "bye bye" with Poppy.
In 2006 I made one of the hardest decisions of my life. I decided it would be best to put my best friend to sleep. She was nearly blind, her back was humped due to arthritis and we had potty issues. I went alone. I held her. I cried for her. It was done. She was 14 years old. I prayed and prayed that last year that I would wake up one moring and she wouldn't....but she held on and held on. Oh how I didn't want to make that decision...but I did...I had to. She was a doll. She had been through alot with me and I hated for it to end...but it did. I had her cremated and she sits on my shelf now with her collar and a picture of better days. Weird I know...something I would never have dreamed of doing...but one never knows what one will do! She was a joy, she was a heartbreak...she is a great memory. She was and is missed.
But now (I have to wipe my eyes) onto my current love. Sirion...my handsome buddy. In 2007 we had 3 kids, the worlds greatest cat, a belligerent, drooly Great Dane and a new home. For SOME reason I felt the need to add to our family. I started scanning the internet for a new dog. I spent a couple of months looking and praying (yes praying) and nothing struck my fancy. One day I was looking at the website of our local animal control and I saw this pathetic looking Weimeraner. Those type of dogs had never been my favorite...for one thing I never could pronounce the name!
We headed to the desk to inquire about him and was told someone had a hold on him. Ok...well that's good and started to turn away when a supervisor asked who had a hold on him. The clerk said someone in Seattle called and wanted a hold put on him. The supervisor said, forget it...we have someone here and now wanting him...let's get him a home. So he became ours. I won't lie...I did go home with buyers remorse...more like fear and it was a rough few months. Special diet, neutering, kennel cough, and the worse of it....separation anxiety. We had things destroyed. But I won't go into details about that. I will say he was never food aggressive, he put on weight, he overcame his anxiety with a kennel and constant love and attention. The best part? He has been the most amazing dog I have ever had. So loving, so gentle, so smart, so obedient, so handsome! I just love this dog. He comes to me when I call him "handsome." Once he was past his trauma of abandonment and starvation he settled. He went from being a dog who would not go potty outside unless I stood at the door to actually sleeping in a room different than the one I am in. He has been amazing with the baby. She loves him...he tolerates her... for food purposes! He is just the most amazing buddy. I know he was an answer to prayer. I know he is a gift to me. I know he will be another heartbreak...but for now...he is a great companion and I adore him. Sirion, meaning 'Little Prince' and that he is......
Thursday, November 19, 2009
Wednesday, November 18, 2009
Our 'tester' lives in Oregon City so if you are need of a 'tester' please let me know and I will joyfully give you her name and number!
Friday, October 30, 2009
My beautiful girl...8mths pregnant with my Grandson
Monday, October 26, 2009
Friday, October 23, 2009
Wednesday, October 21, 2009
Thursday, October 15, 2009
Monday, October 12, 2009
The other goal is to get this home organized. I feel more hopeful about that than I do the weight 'thing' but still it's a mountain in front of me (or all around me!). We have so much stuff and we have so many bodies in this house and due to physical problems and having a very needy 1 year old the house has fall into a pit of despair (ok....a little over the top dramatic?) This is my job, this is my ministry, this is my home and I need it to represent God. I need it to be an outward reflection of a God Loved and redeemed woman. So....I MUST get it cleaned up, organized, and free flowing.
I need to organize my time. It's time for me to get somewhat scheduled. I need to gain some control of my time. I need to quit focusing on 'time wasters.' So, I have to tell family and friends I must turn off my cell for periods of time. I must turn off the pc for periods of time. Both of these are time wasters! With God leading me I know I can get handle on this.
So, that's my heart today. I want to use this blog to share and to record progress, failures, frustration. Feel free at any moment to pray for me. I know I can not succeed under my own power. I know I have a loving father who will provide for all my needs and he will give me the wisdom I need.
So....here we go!
Saturday, October 10, 2009
Wednesday, October 7, 2009
So...here I sit...with so much I could write about, just can't seem to organize my thoughts to write about anything. So, I choose to give the 'lowdown' on the family.
Oldest to youngest.....
The huzb...he is back to working full time since his knee surgery. We had a little 'bump' with finances while that was all going on but I believe we are over it now. I am thankful he is healing and I pray he continues to heal and heals well. He is co-leading a men's study group at our 'Family Night Live' gathering at our church on Tuesdays. I am happy about that. He has great potential to be a good teacher. He needs experience to help him learn to stay focused, learn to organize and study.This is good in MANY aspects for him.
The Adult Son, his wife, and my GRANDSON...they are doing great. They are happy, healthy, and they are participating in their first real ministry. My son is helping me to lead a children's group at our church called Kidz Klub. It has been great fun working with him.
The Adult Daughter...she is now in her 7th month of pregnancy and struggling greatly. Due to her back surgery when she was 13 (a 14 hour surgery) the weight of the pregnancy has caused her great pain with her job. She still does not have a license and must walk to the bus or Max and that causes back pain. Her BF was able to drive her often but as of today he is in the Navy. He left today for boot camp. Soooo, my heart is heavy for my girl. Oh how I want to drive over to her apartment, gather her things and move her back into my home where I can feed her, care for her and hug her when I want. BUT...I can not. I am feeling in my heart there maybe times when she will be here and I will pretend it doesn't thrill me to pieces....but I will for sure worry all the more for her now. She is due December 27th....some come December or possibly January I will have a new grandson to love and adore! Pray for my girl.
My boy A, he is loving High School even though he is a Freshman. He is in football right and loving it. He is doing great at keeping up his homework and his attitude has been wonderful.
My girl SR, she doing wonderful in piano she quite a gift, especially for reading music...now if I can only get her to like and enjoy it! She Loves being at her grandmas more than being home but that is nothing new. Though she struggles with reading and writing, she excels in Science. She also loves to sing so I need to incorporate more music into Homeschooling. She started Volleyball this week.
My girl AR, she is my love bug. She loves to love on me and I take ALL she can give. She too is great at piano. Unlike Staci though...Amy prefers to learn it by memory and play it her way. She enjoys it a little more than her elder sister but not much. I know one day they will appreciate it! She does very well in reading and writing but struggles some with Science. Neither girl does well in Math (why God why?!?!?! my least favorite subject). She is a great singer and loves to sing. Quite an ear for music since she was very little. Just wish she had the courage like her older sib. I can however get them to sing together and we have started working on harmony! She too started Volleyball this week...I had the girls placed on the same team. Makes my life easier.
My girl MK, She wasn't ready for school to start but she has been loving it and enjoying it. She has a great teacher (one my girl SR had before) and she really likes him. She has really settled well into our family. She has become increasingly affectionate. A few months ago she began to cuddle with me occasionally and giving me hugs without me initiating them. Then just the other night she kissed me goodnight...on my lips. I was quite surprised. She loves her parents but seems to be happy and comfortable here. I am glad she gets to see her parents often, that helps her a lot. I am thankful for her.
My boy LB, what a doll. He started Kindergarten this year and oh how thrilled he was. He even gets to ride the bus!!! He loves it. I hate the fact it's half day so I spend my morning watching the clock, get him fed, on the bus and before I know....they are home. But he is happy and he is learning. Now that he is in school I have seen some change in his personality....it always happens. The influence of other kids. He has gotten a little more defiant and a little more ornery. So that has been fun! not! He is still very affectionate and cuddly and oh how he loves the baby in our family! He fits so well into our family, it's great. He too loves his mom and dad very much but seems to be happy and comfortable here. I am thankful for him.
My baby girl, she is a living doll. Ornery as all get out...stubborn, willful, beautiful and so very loved but ALL the family. She has so many people in our family wrapped around her fingers she has no fingers left. She is so full of life. She will not be going back to her bio mom, so now we are praying she will get to stay with us. Oh how we pray that!!! We will for sure keep in contact with mom and any bio family who desires to have a relationship with her. She recognizes her mom as someone she knows, but she for sure sees me, her papa L, and her kids as her family! I am thankful for her.
As for me...I am praying for God's deliverance in areas of my life I need healing and restructure. I am praying constantly for God to fill our home with joy, peace, and laughter. Big changes have happened and big changes are on the horizon so I want my Heavenly Father to always be in the lead. For Him I can trust, For I know he loves me/us and wants what is best for me/us!
He has blessed us so amazingly!
So, that's that for now! Pray for our family....I pray for you, though I don't know who is reading this.......i still pray for you!
Friday, September 25, 2009
Just had to vent a little........
Saturday, September 19, 2009
Thursday, September 10, 2009
Saturday, September 5, 2009
Here are just a few in Oregon:
Here are a few in Washington: